When parents separate, one question comes before almost all others: what happens to the children? Where will they live, how will they spend time with each parent, and who makes the big decisions about their upbringing?
Many parents still use the words “custody” and “access”. In England and Wales, the law talks about child arrangements, and the focus is on what is best for the child, not on which parent “wins”.
It is also a question more families are asking the courts to answer. Cafcass, the body that supports children in family court cases, received 10,889 new private law children's cases between April and June 2026, which is 12.6% more than in the same period the year before. Private law cases are those where parents or family members cannot agree arrangements for a child themselves.
What are child arrangements?
Child arrangements cover where a child lives, how much time they spend with each parent, and other contact such as phone and video calls. They can also cover how children move between homes, and decisions about schooling, medical treatment and travel.
Arrangements can be agreed informally between you, written down in a child arrangements plan, or set out in a court order called a Child Arrangements Order. An order usually lasts until a child reaches 18(Live with) or 16 (spend time with/contact).
Step one: try to agree
Most separating parents do not need a judge to decide for them. Reaching agreement is usually quicker and less expensive than going to court, and it keeps control in your hands. It is also better for children, who can be badly affected when they are caught in the middle of conflict. The main routes are:
- Negotiation: your solicitor and the other parent (or their solicitor) work towards a workable arrangement.
- Mediation: a trained, neutral mediator helps you identify the issues and agree solutions. Many cases are resolved within three to five sessions.
- Collaborative law: both parents and their solicitors meet face to face and sign an agreement to resolve matters without going to court.
- Arbitration: a qualified arbitrator makes a binding decision, which can be faster when court delays are significant.
Before most court applications about children, you will need to attend a Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting, known as a MIAM, unless an exemption applies. At a MIAM, a mediator explains how mediation works, looks at your situation and helps you decide whether it is right for you. If you attend a MIAM but the other parent will not, you can still apply to the court.
Government funding is currently available towards mediation costs for eligible families, in the form of a voucher worth up to £500. The voucher does not cover the cost of the MIAM itself, and your mediator can tell you whether you qualify.
If you do reach agreement, you can ask the court to approve it as a consent order, which makes it legally binding. You do not usually have to attend court for this.
When court becomes necessary
If you cannot agree, or you are worried about your child's welfare, you can speak with a solicitor with a view to helping make an application to the family court on your behalf. The court fee is currently £270. You may be able to get help with the fees, however, you will be means and merit tested.
Once the application is issued, the court sends it to Cafcass, which carries out safeguarding checks. There will usually be an early hearing at which the court looks at whether agreement can still be reached and what evidence it needs. If the dispute continues, there may be further hearings before a final decision. Official guidance says it usually takes around 10 months to get a court order, depending on where you live and your circumstances.
You will not always need a MIAM first. Exemptions include situations where there is evidence of domestic abuse, where a child is at risk of harm, where the application is urgent, or where you are applying for a consent order.
What the court considers
A child's welfare is the court's paramount consideration. In deciding what arrangements are best, the court looks at factors including:
- the child's wishes and feelings, considered in the light of their age and understanding
- the child's physical, emotional and educational needs
- the likely effect of any change in their circumstances
- any harm the child has suffered or is at risk of suffering
- how capable each parent is of meeting the child's needs
There is no fixed age at which a child can choose where to live. Their views carry more weight as they get older and more mature, but the decision remains the court's.
The court generally starts from the position that a child benefiting from the involvement of both parents is in their best interests, unless there is evidence that it would put them at risk. That does not mean equal time. The right pattern depends on what works for the individual child. The court will also only make an order if doing so is better for the child than making no order at all.
Other orders about children
A Child Arrangements Order is not the only option. Depending on your situation, the court can also make:
- a specific issue order, to resolve a particular disagreement such as which school a child should attend, or a medical decision
- a prohibited steps order, to stop a parent taking a particular action, such as taking a child abroad, without the court's permission
Questions of parental responsibility, child maintenance and relocation, whether within the UK or abroad, often arise alongside child arrangements. If an existing order is not being followed, it can be enforced, and orders can be changed if circumstances alter.
When safety is the concern
Where there is domestic abuse, protecting you and your children comes first. Mediation and other out-of-court options are not suitable where abuse is a factor. The court can grant a non-molestation order to prevent violence, threats, harassment or unwanted contact, and an occupation order to regulate who lives in the family home. Where there is immediate risk, orders can be granted without the other person being given notice.
Cafcass data shows that domestic abuse was identified as a factor in more than half of the private law children's cases it dealt with in 2025/26. Legal aid may be available for some domestic abuse cases where you have the right evidence. If anyone is in immediate danger, call 999.
Why take advice early
The family court can be a stressful place to manage by yourself, particularly when emotions are running high. Speaking to a solicitor early helps you understand where you stand, choose the right route for your family, prepare your evidence properly, and avoid steps that create avoidable conflict. You can also instruct a solicitor at any stage, including after you have made an application yourself.
How Lawfrancis Solicitors can help
Lawfrancis Solicitors advises parents across London on child arrangements (living and contact), parental responsibility, child maintenance, relocation disputes, specific issue and prohibited steps orders, and urgent protection for victims of domestic abuse. We look for the most effective route for your family, whether that is negotiation, mediation or, where necessary, court proceedings.
We offer a fixed-fee initial consultation, and we confirm scope, timescales and any court fees in writing before work begins. Same-day appointments are available where deadlines are close.
This article is for general information only and does not constitute legal advice. Every family's circumstances are different, and the law, court fees and funding schemes described here are stated as at October 2026.
